My Sweet Life

I'm in between 2 men. Derek on my left and Jay on my right. Jay asks me softly If I’m comfortable, while Derek sleeps like a baby. I said "yes, I'm ok..." then I closed my eyes trying to sleep.

Yes, I'm in the middle seat, I didn’t choose the aisle or the window seat going to Singapore, I'd rather stay in the middle than to stand up every time someone needs to go. It's just a 4hr flight anyway, I could sleep it off, but I wished I had taken the Sunday flight just like Grace.

On the bright side...we could gimmick tonight at and I could do Sunday shopping at Orchard Road tomorrow.

***

After having a very good dinner at the hotel, Derek suggested that we have a drink at Clarke Quay. Hmm....drinking with 2 men..Ok, a bit worried but...I promised myself to enjoy this trip, so I might as well go and party before the big training on Monday.

***

...Fashion Bar is really rocking as we entered. Jay is obviously happy that we chose a bar where models go to. Derek pretends not to look at the hot girls as he gets us our table. It was a small round table though, I seated between them...but the table is so small that often times...no matter how I position myself.... my legs would brush either Jay's or Derek's knees... I honestly think that they enjoy that part.

Jay ordered 1 small bottle of Johnny Walker..what the hell? I didn’t want to drink that hard so I ordered a Tequila Rose for me and it was so good, Sweet and with a slight rhum taste, perfect for tonight.

As we drink the night away, Jay has been talking/ whispering to me a lot. His knee would sometimes rest on my legs, we both move away at the start, but at the end of my 2nd tequila rose, we didn’t mind at all, what the hell, the table is really small. I'm sure Derek noticed the closeness, but cool as he is, he doesn’t mind the slight flirting and just gulps his drink down. I've been to bars with Derek and office mates before, and he understands these things.

After a few more shots of Jwalker, Jay held my hand and pulled me to dance. At this time, everyone is already dancing so I gladly obliged. Derek also danced with us, but somehow managed to partner with some hot girl dancing near us, go Derek...we were all having fun..good music..good place...good drink. This is party Singapore style.

It was really crowded in the dance area, I couldn’t help fall on Jay's chest as we dance and talk at the same time, we were so high in dancing that we occasionally hug each other while we shout at each other's ear trying to talk. It was so crowded, so loud, no one will ever notice. As we dance close and as he sometimes talk really close to my ear, I can smell his natural scent...and it was sooooo goooood.  I have this thing for guys smelling good..and here I am dancing with one who is getting more attractive the more I smell him...Jay is really sexy after all.  I allowed him to dance as close as he wants...and talk directly to my ear as much as he can...I also ear-talk him back just to get close to his neck and face. Shit ...we are all over each other...I’m glad Jay is such a gentleman...and doesn’t really appear to take advantage...I know that he realized that I trust him...we are just really dancing as if we are one couple...having fun...with unspoken flirting. Shit I hope Derek does not see us. But, what the hell, I’m sure he is somewhere dancing this way too with that girl.

...2 hours of house dacing , 1 Johnny Walker and 6 Tequila Rose later...I'm a bit tipsy. No...I am really tipsy. It is time to go home.

Derek flagged down a cab for all of us. Jay sat with me at the back. He knows im tipsy, he asked me If I want to lean on his shoulder. I did.

While Im leaning on his left shoulder, I can smell him. God..his scent...so good...he smells really good. F#$%..

Derek is seated beside the driver, and started talking about the girl he was dancing with. We started teasing him and we were laughing while throwing sarcastic jokes at each other.  They were teasing me, saying that I’m a good drunk dancer. It was a fun ride home.

In the middle of the ride home, Jay slowly held my hand, gently squeezed to comfort me and asked "you tipsy?” I nodded, squeezed his hand back and let go. It was an  "I’m ok, thanks " squeeze.

***

My room was on the 7^th floor while their rooms are on the 11^th.

As we reach the elevator, Derek pressed 11 and 7, he is such a gentleman. Then he asked “can you walk to your room?” then he continued, “Jay can walk you to your room”  I didn’t say anything, I leaned on the elevator wall closed my eyes, as If telling them to decide for me. But I know that something is definitely up with these two. Did Derek just give me and Jay a go-signal to continue whatever was there in the bar? Should I thank Derek or give him a slap? Or is he just being a gentleman again?

7^th floor, elevator opened, Jay said “come on I’ll walk you, see you tomorrow Derek”, I said goodnight to Derek and watch the elevator slowly close…as I look back, I can see Derek nodding goodnight while giving me this strange look…as if he is telling me to think about my next actions..what might happen. I don’t how he did it but he made me feel that he cares but has to let me go and do what I want. It was the same worried look that a father would give to her daughter on her first date. He looked worried but powerless to do anything about it.

As we reached room 707, Jay was almost carrying me. that scent again...God..so good.....Shit I’m so tipsy.

As I hand him my keycard , I was cool but trembling inside….…

He inserted the keycard, the door light turned green. The door unlocked, he opened and walked me to my dark room.

Last night it happened.

I didnt expect it to happen that way, I didnt expect to lose it to someone like him, but I did.  I thought I could handle It, thought I'm matured enough to do it, but now I'm not sure.

He had just left my room, he wanted to stay longer but I have to ask him to go. As soon as I heard the door closed, I started crying. Did it really happen? I asked myself. I was hoping that it was all a dream, but the bedsheets and the pain tell me otherwise.

They say a woman never forget her first. That is so true, for I remember every second of it. I remember everything that happened that lead to last night, from the flirting, the talking, the sweet moments, the parties, the drinking and finally that moment.

Everything was special and something that I want to cherish forever. Here is how it all started....

Two weeks ago I left for Singapore for a 10-day training. I was really excited. I'm leaving with 4 other officemates and meeting my ex-bf for a few days.

I need this trip, I need a break, I need something new. I've conditioned myself to enjoy this trip to the fullest, meaning shop-till-you-drop, visit all the places to go to and most of all party to the max. Im single and currently unattached, perfect timing indeed.

I will definitely enjoy this trip as I am travelling with the people that I enjoy time with in the office:

Derek - Senior Manager from our R&D group, he is smart, witty, makulit and cute. He is in his mid 30s, atheletic, married and someone fun to be with. We've been close for the last few months since he invited me to join the running club. I've been with him in office parties and he is someone na you can feel safe with.

Allan - Young wizard consultant from our team, 20ish and very metro sexual. Sometimes I feel that he goes for facial more often than me. He is also cute, girls from the office like him, very clean and neat daw. I think he likes me though, he bought me UAAP Finals  tickets even though he is not Green blooded like me. We had coffee a few times but he never really asked me out seriously. But If he does, I'll probably say ..hmmm....yes.

Jay - Manager from our Tech group. He has the bad-boy aura though I can sense that he is bit warm-hearted deep inside. He has a gf from our team and they have been very sweet in the office. He used to YM me alot when they had a cool-off, I felt I was the shoulder to cry on friend. He told everything about his gf and their situation then. Now they are ok and we dont YM much anymore. I actually miss his YMs. He was a good potential....

Grace - Marketing Manager, very cool, funny and super gimmickera ng office.  She can actually finish 1 pitcher of Margarita and 2 Red Horse, in any order. Her BF is also cool and wil follow her in Singapore for a few days, isn't that sweet?

I'm also excited to meet my ex-BF Mark. He is now studying in Sing, and has invited me to spend some nights in his apartment. I'm still thinking about it.

14 days in Singapore.

10 training days.

With 1 girl

4 men.

One of them changed me forever.

Last Saturday I went to a shower party of a family friend. We had a Q&A game....you choose a question from a jar...and the bride-to-be and the one who picked must answer the question..or drink 2 shots of tequilla...

this was the question I picked:

"Going down and dirty: do you prefer to give or to receive?" 

ha ha.....my niece was there so I had to take the tequilla shots....responsible Tita I must say....

now...what  would your answer be?

:) 

I have to attend training in Singapore for 4 days.

Yes, Monday to Thursday. I want to stay till Sunday but I dont want to spend money on hotels so I emailed and ym'd my close friends in singapore, hoping that they could adopt me for 3 nights (poor me).

After endless chatting, my friends can only take me out on weekends but could not help me out with a place to stay because:  they just moved to a new apartment, or they have a roommate, or their family is already staying there for summer and I have to sleep in the couch with her brothers..or I could stay there in July but not June.......bla bla bla.......bad timing.

Everyone is booked...except for one....my ex Mark .

Mark, whom I broke up with 3 years ago is now studying Culinary arts in Singapore. I chatted with him, and he said that he is all alone in his apartment and Im welcome to stay anytime.

We broke up 3 years ago in a good way. I felt that he was not matured enough then to get into a serious relationship, so I decided to call it quits. 3 Years forward, he is now finishing Culinary arts and with plans to take over their family restaurant biz. Good for you Mark.

So..the question is....would you stay in your ex's apartment for 3 nights? We are both unattached now and no plans of getting back together.

Is it ok to stay there? My friend Jen said It is perfectly ok, her rationale is if you've been "together" before, you've overcome the excitement of being "together", there is nothing to prove or to try anymore, we can be very civil and treat each other as best buddies from high school.

hmm....she's partly right. ...

but.....

...an Ex is also someone who you can get really comfortable with........someone you know inside out.....someone who you can trust...someone who can keep a secret.....someone you can do things with, without being judged.....someone safe to be crazy with.....

aghhhhhhh........I'm not sure.....should I stay there...and save shopping money for that Coach bag?

would you do it? help!

:)

My manager just emailed me that I will be going to Singapore for a 4 day training. Orchard shopping here we go!